Visiting a Mosque

Along with three other members of Living Interfaith, I had the privilege of attending the Friday sermon at a local mosque.  It was enlightening, and spiritually beautiful.  

One aspect of it was that so much of the experience felt familiar.  One of the sermon themes concerned the importance of being spiritually integrated – that the person we show the world be the same person we see in the mirror.  It’s a theme I’ve explored more than once.  An interesting question was posed: if you were to meet yourself, would you like the person you’d met?  Would you trust the person you met?  Good questions.  Important questions.

And it struck me.  When we go someplace new, if we are looking to see similarities, generally we see them.  And when we are looking for differences, that’s what we see.  Not an earth-shattering discovery, but interesting.  What can be a challenge is seeking out both, the similar and the different, and, what’s crucial, feeling threatened by neither. 

One clear difference was how women are expected to dress.  One of our group (two men, two women), had a small problem.  While she came looking very well dressed for a non-Muslim, she had forgotten to wear long sleeves (the arms need to be covered, as well as the head).  I quickly loaned her an (almost) matching shirt  to wear under her blouse.  All was fine and we were off.  J

The mosque is in Shoreline.  It is a beautiful, truly beautiful, and spiritually welcoming place to gather.  But there was a moment of concern when we arrived.  Only a couple of cars!  Wrong day?  No.  Wrong time?  No.  Wanting to be good guests we had arrived fifteen minutes early for the 12:30 prayers and sermon.  And there clearly only a few people there! 

Imam Polovina came out to welcome us.  He is a warm and gracious and deeply spiritual man.  He guided us inside.  We all removed our shoes.  The women went upstairs, the men entered at the ground floor. 

Then it was time for me to feel really at home.  Just like Living Interfaith, very few members came early.  But at 12:30 people started pouring in.  And they kept entering during opening prayers. 

The method of praying is different from ours, but it’s purpose is the same – to get outside of ourselves, to acknowledge things greater than ourselves, and to reconnect with the sacred.  And I also couldn’t help but notice (just as I do in churches, synagogues, temples) that some entered deeply into their prayers, and some seemed simply to be going through the motions.  That, for me, is always one of the great dangers of all repeated rituals: that if practiced without intention, they can become rote.

I was moved when, at the very end, everyone stood shoulder to shoulder.  At Living Interfaith, at the close of our service we form a “circle” and hold hands.  But standing truly shoulder to shoulder is also quite powerful.  I want to try it some Sunday.  But I’m getting ahead of myself.

The chanting in Arabic was stirringly, stunningly beautiful.  Centering.  Though I could not understand a word, it did not feel at all “foreign.”  Then there were more prayers.  And then, Imam Polovina gave his sermon … twice!  The first time it was in Bosnian.  The second time in English.  And he does that every Friday!

This, of course, quickly speaks to a common misunderstanding about Islam.  Not all Muslims are Middle Eastern.  Indeed, most of the Muslim world is not.  People may want to web-search Bosnia, to realize how the recent war (1992-1995) savagely impacted the Muslims who lived there.  This mosque in Shoreline is a Bosnian mosque – not that all the members are Bosnian, but the roots are in Bosnia.  The Imam is from Bosnia.

I found out more about Imam Polovina on Sunday, when I returned with others from our church to witness Sunday prayers and then had the chance afterwards to chat both with the Imam and his very gracious wife. 

This is a blog, not a book.  I cannot possibly convey the joy and spiritual fullness of the experience.  Unprompted, several people came over to us, both before the service and afterwards, with a smile and a warm greeting of welcome. 

Ok, I’ll admit it.  I’m not hugely comfortable with the separation of men and women when it comes to prayer.  But I know that such a separation was an integral part of Judaism as well until very recently.  And it remains an integral part of how many Jews still practice their religion.  Out of respect for those Jews and for Muslims who practice a similar separation, I remind myself that they might well be equally uncomfortable if they came to a Living Interfaith service, where men and women sit side by side. And it occurs to me that sometimes becoming comfortable with being a little uncomfortable can be a very good thing!

I believe our great calling is to acknowledge and respect our differences, while at the same time not letting them divide us.

If you have never attended worship at a mosque, I strongly recommend it.  There is much that you will find familiar.  There is much that you will find different.  But at its core, we are all striving to embrace our common humanity.  And we cannot do that behind walls.

The Three Horsemen of the Apocalypse

There’s talk again that, this year, the world really will end.  Much of the chatter seems to come from a misunderstanding of the Mayan calendar.  I can’t and won’t speak to that here.  But I would like to observe that we are indeed in deep trouble. 

There is a trio of beasts loose in the world.  They are voracious.  They will eat anything.  Everything.  They are so relentless, so insatiable, that they make a school of great white sharks appear as total amateurs.  These beasts are so cunning and so quick in their attack, that their victims can be half-eaten without even knowing that they are being devoured.

These beasts stalk the world with a confidence and terror that comes straight out of apocalyptic Scripture.  They are the nightmare of all nightmares.  And it is likely that they are nibbling hungrily at your toes right now – at this very moment.  Unless, of course, they have already consumed you – eaten you whole without your ever knowing it.  For the great true terror of these beasts is that after they have devoured every morsel of your flesh, your blood and your soul, you still walk around like a raging zombie – dead, but undead.  And curiously, while you are able to see the other zombies around you, it never occurs to you that you yourself have become a zombie as well. 

No, it’s not science fiction.  I wish it were.

These insatiable, raging beasts are the Three Horsemen of the Apocalypse.  And they are indeed wreaking unspeakable havoc.  These three horsemen are Anger, Fear and Hate. 

You can see them at work in Israel/Palestine.  You can see them at work in Syria, Iran, and North Korea.  You can also see them at work in Russia, France, Italy, Canada, Japan, Mexico, China, Great Britain, and indeed every corner of the globe.  They are giddily comfortable within the borders of the United States.  We no longer practice politics here.  We practice anger, fear and hate.  Anger, Fear and Hate of “them.”  “They” are at fault.  And “they” are evil.  Whoever “they” happen to be … this week.

The propaganda notwithstanding, Hate, Anger and Fear, know no race.  They know no religion, no gender, no age, and no political affiliation.  They are as comfortable on the Left as the are on the Right, and indeed in the Center as well.

The great secret of their success is our ability to see Hate, Anger and Fear everywhere – everywhere but within ourselves.

Even so, they are not mindless.  They are controlled.  The Three Horsemen of the Apocalypse are controlled.  And if you wish to know who controls them, ponder and then answer these three questions.  “Who benefits from my hate?  Who benefits from my anger?  Who benefits from my fear?” 

These are hard but important questions.  And I believe that the only way we will EVER have even a chance of banishing the Three Horsemen is to take a long, hard look in the mirror: to ponder these questions, to answer them and then to learn to say, “No!”

No!  I will not fear.  No!  I will not be angry.  No!  I will not hate. 

Yet I believe we must also say, “No, I will not hide.  I will not be controlled by anger, fear or hate, but I will speak.  And I will keep speaking, without anger, without hate, and without fear.  I will be heard.  But I will be heard without shouting.”

I believe this is truly the greatest challenge we face.  I pray we are up to it.

In the Presence of Presents

I wanted to wait until the “return season” was over before addressing something that has gnawed at me for well over half a century.  Gift-giving.

Don’t get me wrong, I love giving gifts.  I love giving friends gifts.  I love perhaps even more, saving as much as I can, and then giving gifts to people I don’t know in the form of as many charitable contributions at the end of the year as I can possibly manage.  But today I want to talk about giving gifts to friends. 

What’s the point?  I mean it.  I would ask us to ponder it.  What’s the point?  For me, the point is a show of affection and appreciation.  My favorite gift to give is something that seemed to call a friend’s name as I passed it in a store, and I said to myself, “I bet so and so could use that” or  “I bet so and so would get a kick out of that” or “I bet so and so would really enjoy that.”  And then the agony.  Do I really have to wait for a “special occasion” to give it?

For me, for a gift to be a gift, it should be a “free-will offering” … which is why I have always rebelled against obligatory gift-giving.  I rebel against giving gifts at birthdays (in point of fact, I rebel against “celebrating” birthdays for anyone over the age of twelve, but that’s for another day).  I rebel against giving gifts at anniversaries.  And worst of all, I rebel against giving gifts at Christmas, or whatever holy day or holiday calls to you from your spiritual path.

Apart from the question of whose birthday are we celebrating (if you’ve never heard the Christmas sermon from “The Bishop’s Wife” rent the movie!!) and pondering whether  Jesus might just prefer gifts to alleviate poverty and hunger on his birthday rather than giving Uncle Frank a new power tool, I’d like to ponder gift-giving as an industry.

Is it truly a gift, if it’s mandatory?  For myself, I know that the gifts that warm my heart are the gifts the come from nowhere.  And the gifts I truly love to give are gifts from nowhere.  Sometimes those gifts will receive a baffled look.  “What’s the occasion?” I’m asked.  And my answer is the same.  “No occasion.  I saw it, thought of you and wanted to get it for you.” 

But especially at Christmas, what an industry we’ve developed.  Please, take a moment and ponder what it says about us, not about Jesus, or Chanukah or whatever but about US that December is such a crucial “gift-giving” orgy that much of the retail world lives or dies based on what it can sell for the holidays?

And if a gift is a true gift, a gift from the heart, what does it say about the mind-blowing industry that has developed in gift returns.  Please, ponder it.  Someone gives you a gift from the heart and your response is, “Well, I’d rather have something else.”  And you return it to get something else.  This has become such a part of our culture that we just accept it.  Which is why, yet again, I ask that we ponder it. 

Why do we give gifts?  This past year especially, it’s been made to seem a patriotic duty.  “Give more and help the U.S. recover!” 

I want the U.S. economy to recover as much as anybody.  But is this the purpose of gifts?

If so, I’d offer another solution.  Let’s call it “Friend and Loved Ones Appreciation Year.”  Let’s be on the lookout, all year.  No particular day.  No particular month.  But be on the lookout, and when you see something that a friend you appreciate, or a someone you love, or someone you admire might like – buy it for that person and give it to him or her.  Not because it’s a particular day or week, but because you saw something, thought of that person and wanted to expression your sentiment.

Very personally, this is where I would love to see gift-giving evolve.  We don’t wait for special days.  We don’t wait for those times when we HAVE to give a gift.  We don’t wait for those times when a gift is expected.  You don’t tell your beloved that you love him or her on that one day of the year when you are expected to remember!  You say it because you’re thinking of her or him.  And if you’re not, then that’s something ELSE to ponder!

Personal rule of thumb: if you feel you have to buy a gift, don’t.  Never go out, spending hours trying to find a gift you “have” to buy.  But on the other hand, or is it thumb J, always keep your eyes open.  If you do, at least in my experience, things leap out at you and say, “George would love this!” or “This is SO Janet.”  When that happens, if you can afford to, buy it.  And don’t wait for a birthday or an anniversary or Christmas.  Give the gift.  Give it because you care, not because you have to.

Lastly, when I was a kid I remember well the phrase, “It’s the thought that counts.”  Perhaps it’s because we realize that with the forced giving at times like Christmas, there’s so little thought behind the gift, but whatever, the idea behind “It’s the thought that counts” has all but vanished. 

But I submit to you that it IS the thought that counts.  Indeed, it’s all that counts.  The value of a gift is not whether it is something you want to acquire.  The value of the gift is in the care and love and thoughtfulness of the giver.   Thus, to return a gift is to misunderstand and indeed pollute the very notion of gift-giving. 

When we give a gift, what’s the point?   Just something to ponder.